What the?
A guy walks into a bar and takes a seat. Before he can order, the bowl of pretzels in front of him says: “Hey, you’re a handsome fellow.”
The man tries to ignore the bowl of pretzels and orders an apple cider.
The bowl of pretzels then says: “Ooooh, an apple cider, great choice. You’re a smart man.”
Starting to freak out, the guy says to the bartender: “Hey, what the hell, this bowl of pretzels keeps saying nice things to me!”
The bartender replies: “Don’t worry about it, the pretzels are complimentary.”
The wedding
The wedding ceremony came to the point where the minister asked if anyone had anything to say concerning the union of the bride and groom.
The moment of utter silence was broken when a beautiful young woman carrying a child stood up.
She starts walking slowly towards the minister.
The congregation was aghast – you could almost hear a pin drop. The groom’s jaw dropped as he stared in disbelief at the approaching young woman and child. Chaos ensued. The bride threw the bouquet into the air and burst out crying.
Then the groom’s mother fainted. The groomsmen started giving each other looks and wondering how to save the situation.
The minister asked the woman: “Can you tell us why you came forward? What do you have to say?”
There was absolute silence in the church.
The woman replied: “We can’t hear you in the back.”
This shows what happens when people are considered guilty until proven innocent.
