Descriptive language strategies help strengthen relationship building and resilience
By Sonia Isaacs
THE power of language is crucial, and some schools are adopting an innovative approach that uses adaptive language to simplify tools for building positive relationships. Programs like ‘URSTRONG’ in schools promote these strategies, particularly by encouraging better conflict resolution skills targeted at primary aged children and their families.
One key aspect of these strategies is adapting language when referring to negatively impactful or adverse behaviour, such as bullying. This approach offers a more accessible way to unpack behaviour and promote resilience and respect in an age appropriate manner. A popular method is to reframe the term “bullying” by using the phrase “mean on purpose.”
Sarah Leary, Assistant Head of Primary at Glasshouse Christian College, explained that while the college still references the word “bullying,” they are moving towards encouraging the use of descriptive language. This shift helps students, families, and staff better identify and address behaviours, leading to positive solutions rather than simply labelling an individual.
Ms Leary said the ‘Friendology 101’ curriculum, offered through the URSTRONG program, provides proactive tools to manage friendships and wellbeing. The term “mean on purpose” specifically targets behaviour rather than labelling students, aiming to reduce the stigma associated with bullying.
“Through this program, we use a positive psychology approach to friendship. What we were noticing was that some kids were lacking skills in developing friendships and conflict resolution,” Ms Leary explained. “This program was exactly what our kids needed, and we also liked that it includes a parent component. By using appropriate terms when describing those involved in bullying, we can help recognise that bullying is about behaviour, which can and does change.”
Ms Leary highlighted that one key advantage of adapting language positively is that it provides greater scope to encourage empathy, understanding, and healthy conflict resolution. “The word ‘bullying’ has such a defined definition, and many of us don’t necessarily think of that when we use it,” she said. “We need to be careful with our language, particularly with emotive words like ‘bully.’ We don’t want to give that label to children, especially when they are younger, as it can be really hard to break.”
Carol Markie-Dadds, Country Director of the Triple P Positive Parenting Program, noted that using plain language makes it easier for children, especially younger ones, to understand the problematic behaviour and what is expected of them.
“Bullying is a complex term and can encompass many different behaviours, but it always involves purposeful behaviour intended to cause harm,” Ms Markie-Dadds explained. “Triple P supports the use of clear, descriptive language. This makes it easier for everyone to have a shared understanding of what’s expected of them.” sonia@gcnews.com.au
