Is there an app that doesn’t fill me with impending dread

By Crank the Croc


I SEE that Enid Blyton is the latest children’s author to face the wrath of modern-day sensibilites.

Or ‘sensitivities’.

Apparently the use of the words ‘idiot’ and ‘shut up’ are too much for young readers. This follows Roald Dahl’s novels getting  a touch-up for describing characters as ‘fat’ and ‘double-chinned’ among other horrific adjectives.

Censoring like this is a slippery slope. There is no limit to what offends and the chances of a book surviving a single generation let alone being handed down over many is fraught. Coincidentally I recently had to re-read one of Blyton’s Famous Five books to the young ones before bed. Different point but where Dahl still has an edge to his novels, Blyton is a bit of a bore. But regardless, neither authors’ intent should be twisted to suit the sensitivities of a few.


Speaking of modern-day sensitivities I was struck by the story of a teacher sacked for smacking a seven-year-old on the hand.

Probably shouldn’t do that, but the fact that the incident went all the way to court and is now being appealed after the case was dismissed by a very sensible magistrate is a stunning outcome.

The only winner in this case is the magistrate who said what most of us are thinking all the time. “This is a classic case of the insanity that has overtaken society in the 21st century,” he lamented.

“It started in the 1980s when we advised students that they had rights and we took away the control and power of firstly parents then teachers, then the police, and even the courts.” Enough said.


IT stands to reason if you think technology might do you out of a job you might have a bit of a whinge but it seems like every columnist on the planet is writing about whether artificial intelligence is going to make them redundant.

It’s understandable in a way given  columnists are by nature quite thin-skinned creatures – excluding yours truly, duh –  and hand-in-hand is their paranoia at them and their thoughts being redundant.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock you would know about Chat GPT which is equally the end of the world (kids cheating through school) or the greatest tool at making our lives even more efficient (yay). Reading some columnists and you can only pray that AI will take them out.

As for me,  I’ve tried to get it to write my column, but it’s even worse.